Amber’s a tidy person, her husband he is not
Whenever he’s finished with products,  he discards them on the spot.
The bathroom sink gets littered with gels, sprays and  cream
His empty bottles tubes and sprays make Amber want to scream.

He came home all excited, a new product in his hand
Overnight cream and a nightcap to condition his hair, every strand.
He put them in the bathroom but dumped them in the sink
Seeing Amber wasn’t pleased he gave her a cheeky wink.

That night was Amber’s grooming time, to wax and pluck and preen
Not a trace was left in the bathroom,  everything sparkling clean
She tidied away all products whilst uttering a little curse
Including her spare hair remover, mistakenly placed in reverse.

That night Jamie squeezed out the contents of the tube that was closest to hand
Smearing it liberally all over his head, but it wasn’t the one he had planned
Next morning he looked in the mirror and almost died in fright
Inside of the cap lay all his hair, on his head not one was in sight.

He screams were almost deafening, heard halfway down the street
Instead of the hair conditioner he had used Amber’s ‘Veet’
Realising what had happened, she told him to his face
If you had just put your things away, not a hair would be out of place.

She hoped he’d learned his lesson as his sorrow she did soothe
And secretly smiled whilst stroking his head which was beautifully silky and smooth.