
- You’re unattractive.
- You’re rude.
- You asked me out immediately.
- It’s been two weeks and you still haven’t asked me out.
- Your first date suggestion was your own apartment.
- We’ve already hooked up.
- We work together.
- You appear to be strangling a dog in that one photo.
- No face pictures.
- No body pictures.
- No fish pictures.
- No pictures.
- You confuse ‘weather’ and ‘whether’ in your bio.
- You called me ‘mama.’
- You work in finance.
- You work in tech.
- You’re a doctor but not a brave kind, like maybe a dentist or you look at buttholes.
- You don’t work.
- You seem to live 300 miles away.
- You seem to live with your mom, which is fine, but also, ew.
- You seem to already have a girlfriend.
- Your ex is really hot.
- Your ex is ugly.
- Your ex is in your photos – get her out of there.
- You say you’re ‘not looking for anything serious.’
- You say you’re ‘definitely looking for something serious.’
- I have acid reflux right now, can’t talk.