Praise Be! The Handmaid’s Tale has returned! Last season left us at the end of the book, so this season was destined to be all new plot lines. Not that I read the book (or any book), but some of us do, allegedly.

The first episode was pretty dark. All the Handmaids get taken to what initially appears to be a fun off-site at Fenway Park, except instead of talking about their feelings and playing improv games, they got threatened with death. Ultimately, they all live of course — they got those yummy yummy uteri. I was ready to give up on the entire show until 3 minutes before the end, Nick showed up, and I was like, oh yeah, that’s why I watch this show. But seriously, we don’t have any bright scenes like all the handmaids going shopping for oranges. This is blood, gore, torture, and Nick is very hot.

I think the second season is still excellent, but it does feel like they have to work harder and harder to shock. I’m definitely not as drawn in as I was first season. I’m also getting tired of the flashbacks. I thought they were the best part of Season 1 (esp. Nick episode), but now it’s like, we get it, you were a basic bitch and then society slowly descended into a dystopian nightmare blah blah blah how many times do we need to rehash that? I just don’t think there’s that much more we could learn about their lives pre-Gilead.

In episode 2, Nick and June get it on for a while which I LOVED except I couldn’t help but wonder if June had bad body odor. She’d been traveling in the back of a truck for days and then like waiting around that barn area, so she can’t have been that fresh. I use all natural deodorant, Nick, if you want to bone a more refreshingly-scented lady! I admire June’s lack of self-consciousness though — I won’t have sex if I’ve gone more than 6 days without changing my underwear. Because I have standards.

I really enjoyed the deep-dive into Alexis Bledel’s character. Actually, I’m kinda just attracted to her also. Alexis and this girl I met at a party in Michigan once are the only two ladies to ever make me question my sexuality. Those eyes — I could look into them forever! Or at least for the 54 minutes or so that the episode went on.

I do think ‘The Handmaid’s Tale’ is just as high-quality as everyone thinks it is, but I could use a little more dialogue. I think the scripts must be like 3 pages long. Elisabeth Moss is a genius and gets a lot of great work out of her neck, but I could still do with some more words. I’ll definitely keep watching because I have a lot of free time. Like all of you, I want to see Gilead fall because then maybe the Trump administration will be next.