- Hey listener.
- Hello to myself and cohost when we edit this at a later time.
- Hey to the Apple employee who listens to this when it’s flagged for inappropriate content.
- How’s it going, Mom?
- Thanks for tuning in, ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend who’s trying to scope out if I’m cooler than her (I’m not).
- Is anyone out there?
- Just want to give a shout-out to my awesome mother! I’m not embarrassed to admit publicly that I’m a momma’s boy, especially since she’s the only person listening.
- Is it just me or is solitary confinement even more boring than it used to be?
- You’re probably looking for a different, more popular podcast with a similar name. We intentionally named this podcast “S-Village,” to amass downloads for people looking for, ya know, something else. This podcast is similar to “S-Town,” except it’s entirely about burritos.
- Hello to my kids 20 years in the future when they decide it’s time to find out if mom was ever cool (she wasn’t).
- This isn’t the podcast where I bring on men I’ve slept with. That’s not to say I didn’t invite them, they just didn’t come.
- Thanks for tuning in, and Venmo me for the $3 I promised you!
- Hello, mirror.
- Mom!!
- Hey to our one guest if they decide they want to know how their voice sounds in a mic.
- Grandpa, I’m proud of you for getting the iPhone working!
- Hey, Marcy, yes, now that you’ve downloaded it and hit ‘play,’ you can stop listening. Thanks for being a good friend.
- I’m telling ya, Trump, I know you love the news but there’s better content out there.
- Hey listeners! Tweet at me if you’re not my mom! (an hour later) Oh, ok, no new tweets. Cool. Hey, Mom.
- Shout out to my whole college improv team!
- Mom are you still there?
- Mom, can you donate another $10 to my Patreon?
- Bye Mom.
Little Old Lady Comedy 