- Most Convincing Denial of Sexual Assault
- Least Convincing Denial of Sexual Assault
- Best Supporting Role AKA Rape Apologist
- Best Performance By An Otherwise Unknown Artist Who Is Now Famous For Being A Sexual Predator
- Most Inappropriate Joke About ‘Me Too’
- The Harvey Weinstein Award For Making The Most Women Watch Them Shower Naked
- The Matt Lauer Award For Most Buttons Under A Desk
- Best Animated Explanation Of Why Their Accusers Are Lying
- Stickiest Cum
- Best Original Script Of An Apology Facebook Post
- Most Original Score Even Though They Only Scored By Ignoring Very Obvious Non-verbal Cues
- Best Costume Forcibly Removed From A Woman
- Best Soundtrack With Backup Vocals Of A Woman Saying “No” On Repeat
- The “Daddy” Award For Sleeping With Women Young Enough To Be Your Daughter
- The Woody Allen Award For Sleeping With Your Daughter
- Best Actor in A Comedy, Drama, Or Horror Film Taking Place In A Woman’s Trailer While She’s Trying To Do Her Job
- The Best Picture Award For This Picture:
Little Old Lady Comedy 